Published November 3, 2009
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It's really short, and it has some errors. You should add some more detail and correct some sentences, and it will be even better.
You need to capitalize the first letter for the dialogue and put a comma before the word was. And the word conter is spelled wrong. You forgot a "u" in it.
Put a comma before One day, because it's sort of a pause, and a comma will clarify that. Also before the word delighted, a comma. You have a few run on sentences, so read it over and put a period after she loves to swim, and to make a dream come true. Capitalize the next sentence and put a : (I forgot what it was called
Capitalize, commas, and periods. The word comfirmed is wrong. Replace the first "m" with "n."
The whole birthmark thing, and how she can't go into the water, was pretty cool. Sorry for nit-picking by the way.